I can confidently say that going down on my partner – making her feel good – is among my favorite things and biggest turn-ons. However, a common obstacle throughout our relationship has been a degree of inconsistency in my (for lack of a better word) performance of oral sex or manual stimulation. My partner already has difficulty achieving orgasm due to anxiety and a history of trauma, and so it is critical to me that I give her a comfortable and pleasurable experience. I try hard to actively listen to what she says feels good, but due to her anxiety around sex, she is often reluctant to speak about her pleasure and let me know what would feel best. We are both a little unsure of what motions or rhythms would feel good. Enter OMGYes.
OMGYes offers articles about different stimulation techniques for people with vaginas. The website includes video demonstrations as well for more visual learners. It offers hand-only, non-penetrative methods that the folks at OMGYes determine to be most pleasurable. The website is quick to assert that everyone’s experiences and preferences vary, and that they are not prescriptive with these methods. Instead, here are some techniques that several people can vouch for, which the reader may not have tried yet. The voices of these articles and the folks demonstrating the techniques are people with all body types, ages, and races.
While generally framed as tools for masturbation, the OMGYes tutorials are informative for all people pleasuring vaginas, be it their own or a partner’s.
While generally framed as tools for masturbation, the OMGYes tutorials are informative for all people pleasuring vaginas, be it their own or a partner’s. It is important to note that these articles and videos are in a lot of detail, which is great for feeling confident that you know what you’re doing, but can also be jarring as the videos are explicit. This is not the kind of research to do in a public library, rather at home with the curtains drawn and in incognito mode if you are as skittish and self-conscious as I am. Additionally, at $59, it could be a little pricey to the college crowd.
Communication during sex is always going to be a work in progress for my partner and me, but OMGYes has helped me feel more confident in what I am doing. I have been able to coax more clearly pleasurable reactions from my partner. Instead of just getting frustrated or feeling lost when she says something doesn’t feel good, I have alternatives to try. OMGYes is a clear, thorough resource that I would recommend to anyone who can afford it.